Just a date
by rk-kitty
Summary: COMPLETE, w00t! A Battousai POV like no other. Really silly...(Extra note Can't find the last chapter? I know, I'll tell you how in the 7th one...)
1. Default Chapter

AN- A short deal of pure stupidness. That's all you need to know.

Disclaimer- I think we all know no one on this site owns RK by now. Unless...unless the creator secretly writes fanfiction under a code name or something...Hey, you never know!

I hate laundry.

Why would anybody want to do the stupid chore, anyway? You have to go through all the trouble of filling up the stupid tub and getting your hands all wet. And not just with water. Personal hygiene, people. You don't even know where those clothes have been! Unless, of course, they're your own clothes.

So, I therefore conclude that everybody should do their own laundry instead of making me do it for them. The world would be a happier place, I assure you.

Well, technically, it's Kenshin that makes me do it, not everybody.

Who am I? I'm Kenshin. And before you try to send me off to the loony bin, let me explain a few things for you. I'm Kenshin's alter ego, of sorts. Ha, that's right. I'm Battousai. I bet you're scared now. Well, you shouldn't be!

You know, you kill a few people and then all of a sudden you're a bad guy. People nowadays, they're so stereotypic. I mean, this era wouldn't even exist without me! Ungrateful little...

Oh. You see, you'll have to forgive me, because I have this little problem of rambling on and on, and if I go too far you'll have to smack me to make me shut up, but I'd advise strongly against it, because I could, after all, 'chop your head off'. I really think the people are being just a little unfair, though. The moment someone says my name everyone gets all 'Oh my god, I'm gonna die!' Sheesh. Even my other side doesn't trust me! Thusly, I spend my days watching my other side live a life of utter pointlessness and stupidness. Booooring.

Oh, I've tried to escape before, but the only way to do that is if he starts losing his marbles. Which doesn't happen in the best situations. You see, the rurouni is a big slacker. He lives his oh-so-nice life, and then when the going gets tough, he hides behind me and expects me to pick up all his dumb marbles for him. Then blames me for all the destruction in the aftermath! So I always end up showing when there is a life-threatening situation, and by then I'm already half way beaten up, so I usually pass out or something of the sort afterwards. And then? And then I wake up as 'the unworthy one.'

Yes, he actually refers to himself like that! His thought processes aren't even interesting!

Well, he has been getting redundant with his thoughts lately. They're starting to get repetitive. "Miss Kaoru looks very nice today. I wonder where she is going. Should I follow her? Is she meeting with somebody? I wonder if she has a boyfriend..." Kaoru, Kaoru, Kaoru. I think he should go put himself out of his misery and ask her out.

Then he recites a long speech about how unworthy he is because of me. Me?! Whatever. And unworthy? You saved the girl's life about one million times, I think she owes you at least a little date.

Then there's a little lecture on blood-tainted hands and 'pure' Miss Kaoru. Pure? She beats your face in more than any adversary I've ever faced. And you've put your hands in laundry water–her laundry water, mind you–enough for them to be clean.

My points are perfectly valid. But, being a naturally stupid person, rurouni Kenshin just can't comprehend and forgets I exist.

Well, this has become a lovely asset to me. You see, I conclude that if I prove myself as "the total role model of self-control" to _him_, than he'll let me come out of this literally stupid prison a little more often, and prove myself as "the total role model etcetera, etcetera" to everybody else! I know, I'm brilliant, you don't have to tell me.

I have also concluded that to get out of here and carry out my extremely well-thought-out plans, I'll have to get Kenshin knocked unconscious. A lot easier to get out that way than have him threaten both his and my life.

But, there was one little problem with my seemingly flawless plans (bwahaha!); I have absolutely no control over him where I am now (aww...). So, I decided I will just wait for him to get knocked unconscious on his own accord.

Unfortunately, that has been really hard as of lately, seeing as he's avoiding Kaoru since he walked in on her dressing in her room. And I was depending on her to knock him out, too! Well, he escaped her this time, but they say that the third time's the charm!

What am I planning to do to prove myself, you ask? Ha ha, that is a secret. Oh, okay I'll tell you. I'm planning to take Kaoru out...on a date! Grand idea, yeah? I'm so ingenious. That will definitely prove myself "worthy" in both of their eyes. You know, kill two birds with one stone. No, not literally. I don't think that would get the right idea across, though I've considered it.

So, that's how it was going to go down. And you can just imagine how happy I was when I saw the perfect opportunity...

AN-Yes, very stupid. I don't know if I should continue, I mean, I've been slacking a lot on my other deals lately. Oh, well, you tell me.


	2. Chapter 2

1AN-Ah, it's been years. Oh, well, this was a little insignificant story anyway. Thanks for the support for my stupid story!

What was I talking about? Ah, that's right! The perfect opportunity. Well, it all started on a lovely spring day...no birds singing, humid, dark grey skies, and a one-hundred percent chance of rain. Perfect day, I tell you.

Even everyone's attitude matched; irritable and moody. How does this make the perfect setting, you ask? Because Kaoru was really high-strung. No, _really_ high-strung. When I say that, I don't mean she was nervous. I mean she had that look. That 'Put one toe out of line and I'll kick your ass to Kyoto' kind of look. I knew because I looked at a lot of people like that. And you better believe I kicked a lot of asses to Kyoto–er, heaven.

But, then again, I'm straying off the topic.

I guess it goes without saying that Sano and that one kid had black eyes before the end of the morning, leaving Kenshin–yes, I know this could get confusing to the more stupid part of the audience–the only person without his daily dose of bruises. That was probably due to the fact he tried to stay away from 'Miss Kaoru' as much as humanely possible.

Curse him. Of all the days he could be smart he chose that one.

It seemed like another beautiful day down the drain, but, oh ho ho, what do we have here? Kenshin had managed to save some dry laundry from the inevitable rain. He folded it all neat-like. Psh. Women's work. Why and how does he do it? If it was me behind the controls, you can bet that I wouldn't do any of it. I mean, it's bad enough that he wears that stupid–

Rambling? Was I? Gotcha.

Anyways, after the clothes were folded, he took them to their owner's rooms. Kaoru's clean clothes somehow ended up last, and he paused outside her door. Ha, ha, that's because last time he walked in on her while she was getting dressed. That was funny, but back then I didn't think to take advantage of the situation.

So he knocked on her door. There wasn't an answer and he walked right in. Man, was her room a mess! Clothes everywhere.

Kaoru was sleeping soundlessly on her futon. He blanked out in the mind after that. You see, being in the state I am now, I have no visuals of what he sees. Just the little thoughts he has. So, yeah, I've never really looked at Kaoru for over two minutes.

But that's besides the point. The point being that after a few moments of watching Kaoru sleep, Kenshin finally turned to leave. Whether it was the clothes on the floor or his own two feet, I'm not sure, but he somehow tripped and fell. It was _hilarious_. I couldn't stop laughing. What, you don't think it's funny? Oh, maybe I should've mentioned he fell on top of Kaoru.

Well, it also goes without saying she woke up and beat him to a bloody pulp, calling him a pervert. Which isn't exactly untrue. I mean, have you seen some of his thoughts on her? I tell you, for someone who is supposed to be acting all guilty and whatnot, he sure comes up with some nasty stuff.

You would've thought the lovely day ended there, but then he was knocked unconscious. I had waited for a while for that chance to pop up, and if you think that I was going to let it pass me up then you're dumber than I thought.

(B)

Damn, but I was sore. And tired. I don't really know why. Before I could even contemplate why that might be, I felt someone poke me in the side.

"Kenshin, are you alright?"

"Oi, Jou-chan sure did a number on you. What'd you do this time?"

Kenshin? Were they talking to me? Then, I remembered. I sat up quickly and looked around. A man in white clothes and a little spiky-haired kid. Sano and...what was it? Yahiko? I think that's right. I can see! It worked! I'm free! I stared at my hands, flexing my fingers a few times, just to be sure.

"Uh...You okay, there, Kenshin?" Yahiko asked. I looked at him. His somewhat worried glance turned shocked. "Sano...look!"

Sano looked at me and went all shocked, too. What? What was it?

"Quick, kid, go get Jou-chan," he said.

Yahiko went off running, shouting, "Hey Ugly! Kenshin went Battousai!"

What?! How did that kid know that!? I got up and ran after him. He couldn't tell Kaoru! It would ruin everything!

In tiptop shape I would've easily caught him. But after all the damage Kaoru managed to inflict it was a bit harder. Not to mention I haven't had control of this body in a long time. I just barely caught him by his ankles, bringing both of us to the ground.

To complete my day, Sano landed on top of us, obviously a failed attempt to catch me. Well, not exactly failed. If that rooster wasn't the epitome of stupid then I don't know what is.

I managed to extricate myself from the pile of stupid on the ground and stood up.

"What is your problem?" I snapped. Before I could do anything else, Sano and Yahiko staggered to their feet. Sano pointed at me.

"Quick, get him before he kills somebody!"

"Oh, for the love of..." I rolled my eyes. "Listen, you idiot, I haven't even--"

Unfortunately, they weren't paying any attention. They instantly dove on me again. I knew it would only be too easy to kick their asses and get away, but I also knew that doing such a thing would not earn me any respect whatsoever, so I allowed them to "capture" me. It was tedious. Those two couldn't find their way out of a paper bag. Even after practically handing my ass over on a platter to them, they still continued to fight, kicking and yelling. I was about to finally give up when all of a sudden I heard a loud scream. Everyone stopped, which wasn't at the best time because at that moment, everyone was on top of me and I couldn't breathe. For people who claim to be poor, according to the rurouni, they sure seemed to be packing on the pounds.

"What the hell are you guys doing?" said a feminine voice. I looked up from my position on the ground and, what do you know, there she was. A woman wearing a pink kimono was standing above me, her hands on her hips. The kimono was sticking to her, due to the heavy rain. Hmm, must be Kaoru.

I wasn't going to lie; Kaoru was a cutie, alright, but she couldn't have been older than twenty. Damn, but my other side isn't as innocent as he claims to be. Doesn't he know he could get put in jail for that sort of thing?

Then I remembered my counterpart was about as slow as molasses when it came to "that sort of thing", not to mention slower when it came to everything else, and I guess I could see some logic there.

Well, being that I wasn't, I decided to speed things up a little. Besides, it's just a date. What could possibly go wrong?

"Kaoru," I groaned, my voice all hoarse due to the fact I had a bunch of fat idiots laying on top of me. She looked at me, her eyes a mixture of pity and anger. I kind of wanted to shout out that it wasn't my fault that my stupid half fell on you earlier, but I wisely decided not to, and instead I put my stunningly persuasive reasoning skills to use. "Wanna go out on a date with me tonight?"

I personally thought that was a very good approach, but I must've screwed something up, because everyone wouldn't stop staring at me, including Kaoru. She just kind of...stared. Stared really hard. Being that I am Battousai and I'm not scared of anything, I stared back.

"Well?"

And then Kaoru fell backward, hitting the wet, muddy ground with a loud thud.

AN- Review if you can, it would be appreciated. Thanks again for reading/reviewing!


	3. Chapter 3

AN-There ya go. Thanks for support.

Disclaimer-Don't own RK. There. I said it. I hope you're happy.

Warnings-OOC

Well, it didn't look like Kaoru was going to wake up any time soon, so I put her back in her messy room. Sano and Yahiko actually let me do that without jumping me, and when I walked back outside, they were both staring at me. I stared back.

"What?" I finally asked, not breaking eye contact with them.

"You...just...asked Jou-chan out," Sano stated plainly, sounding like an idiot, which isn't surprising, seeing as he is one.

"And your point is?"

"Who are you?!" Yahiko suddenly broke in and Sano smacked the back of his head, causing him to stumble forward.

"Why'd you ask her out?" Sano continued, his hand over Yahiko's mouth.

Hmm, these two were stupider than...uh... Actually, I couldn't think of anyone or anything that was as stupid as them. Maybe the other me, but hey, even _he_ had a little more brains than them. "Because I can," I said. "Wasn't it obvious I was going to eventually?"

"Well...yeah, but...but..."

"Yes, I have a brain, even though it may not seem like it. Here, make yourself useful and tell me when Kaoru wakes up. I'll be outside." I went outside, deciding to further contemplate the rest of my ingenious plan.

I looked around. It was getting dark. If Kaoru didn't wake up soon, then there wouldn't be a date at all, and I'd have to risk going to sleep and waking up as the rurouni, which would suck very badly, because then he would know that if he got knocked out then I could take over and then he would never let himself get knocked out again and...

I shook my head. This was going to be harder than I thought. For one, I looked like crap. Very muddy crap. I looked myself over again and realized that I was wearing pink. Pink?! Damn it, I was not getting very much to work with. I sat down next to the laundry tub, which was full of rainwater, sighing. Something was sticking in my side and I pulled it out.

Of course. It was that dumb backwards sword he carried around with him. I unsheathed it and looked at it. Stupid piece of crap. What was the point of carrying it around if it didn't do anything? The other side probably wasn't that sharp, either. I tried to test it by hitting the laundry tub with the sharp side and I accidentally cut it in half. The water started spilling out of the split sides and I hurriedly withdrew the sword and scooted away from the bucket.

Well, that took care of that problem. At least I knew I wouldn't have to do any laundry for a while. I guess that sword was a little sharper than I thought.

A lot of things have changed since my last _real_ possession of this body. First of all, I had pink on. Pink. Battousai does not wear any sort of pink under any sort of circumstance. And secondly, I was carrying around a sword that must have been made by some sort of dyslexic idiot. And thirdly...

I fished out the tiny little scrap of cloth that my other side called a wallet from my clothes and discovered that he--my other side, that is--was currently unemployed. He had about as much money as he did brains.

How the hell was I supposed to take Kaoru out if I didn't any money? I tried to think about where I could get some money when suddenly Sano came around the corner.

"Hey, Jou-chan woke up. She doesn't believe you asked her out and blah, blah, blah..." It was like his mouth was moving but all I was hearing was blah, blah, bl...

And then it dawned on me... "Hey, Sano..." I said slowly. "We've been friends for a long time, right?"

"Uh, yeah?"

"Remember all that money you mooched off of me?"

"Kenshin, I don't have any..."

I grabbed his collar. "Give me some money or I'll..." Wait! This was not self-control, here... "I mean, let me borrow some money...please." There. See. I can do nice. In fact, I think I'm a very nice person, if I do say so myself. I mean I said _please_, for crying out loud.

Before Sano could reply, a timid voice came from around the corner. "K-Kenshin?"

I released Sano. "Yes?"

"Can here...please?"

Uh oh. If I didn't have any money, then I would have to tell Kaoru the date was off, and my plans would be screwed. No, _I _would be screwed.

I rounded the corner anyway and walked toward Kaoru. "Yes?"

I looked at her face. She looked all nervous and edgy, and, judging on what Sano had already told me, she was probably going to ask me what happened before she passed out. And then it occurred to me that I didn't have an answer.

"Uhm... Did you... did you ask me something earlier today?" I told you.

Anyway, I was about to say 'Yes, I asked you out on a date,' but then I thought of two things. One, I couldn't take Kaoru out tonight, due to lack of proper funding (my moneynone) and two, I couldn't have Kaoru know I wasn't Kenshin anymore. Well, actually, yes, I was Kenshin, just not Kenshin. Because Kenshin is actually a rurouni now, and I am not a rurouni. Well, actually, yes I was, now, but that wasn't my choice. Well, actually, yes it was my choice, but not actually _my_ choice. It wasn't like I wanted to... Well, actually, yes...

Okay. I'll shut up now. Anyway, the point was that Kaoru can't know that I don't have any money as well as the fact that I changed. Quote unquote, changed. So I said, "Yes, Kao-I mean! Yes, _Miss_ Kaoru, I asked you if you would like to _accompany_ me–I mean!–this unworthy one tomorrow night."

Hmm, that sounded good. I used this 'unworthy' one, _Miss_ Kaoru, and accompany. Accompany? Accompany is a big word. Rurouni Kenshin uses big words. See? I can play both parts. And I made it tomorrow, so I have more time to prepare. I hope she doesn't remember what I really said.

"You did?!"

"Ye–Well...that I did."

"What did I say?!"

"You..." I tried to think if the other me would say something else for the word 'you'. Nope. "You didn't say anything...that you did...not. You were knocked ou–you became unconscious." Whoa. That sounded stupid. I wonder if that's even a real sentence. You became unconscious...? Maybe I should stop with the big word thing.

"Oh...well..." Kaoru said, blushing, sounding a little disappointed. Maybe I should have told her she became all aroused and stuff and said "Yes, _yes_, I love you Kenshin! Especially when you don't act like a total idiot! Kiss me!".

Well, maybe not so much like that, but...

"Okay," she said, interrupting my thoughts. "Yes, I... I would like that."

"Really?! I mean, good," I said, trying not to sound like an idiot. She smiled and I returned it before leaving.

Okay, here was the overview of the whole thing:

One - take control of Kenshin's–er, _my_ body. Check.

Two - Ask Kaoru out on a date and actually get her approval. Check. Hah, I'm on a roll.

Three - Well, three used to be 'take Kaoru out on date', but I think it was now 'get some money, then take Kaoru out on date'. Half check. Wait, no, no check...yet.

AN-Well, I don't really know how long this is going to be, so...uh.. Thanks for any reviews and reads(?) I got! I love you guys.


	4. Chapter 4

AN-Uh...Thanks for all reviews for my silly doofus story.

Disclaimer-I don't own RK. There. I said it.

Warnings-OOC

Where the hell was I supposed to find some money? There were three possibilities that came to my mind: One, get a job. Well, I don't think I get much for doing one day's amount of work, so that pretty much eliminates that idea. Two, I could steal the money from some dolt on the street. Though that seemed like an okay idea, I remembered that my other side was still watching me and I'd probably get points taken off of my conduct grade, which was the whole motive behind this thing.

And then there was Three, which was to make Kaoru pay for everything. Ha, don't make me laugh. I'd be lucky to get killed quickly and painlessly.

Suddenly, as I was contemplating just how painful it would be if Kaoru literally killed me, my senses jumped at me and I leaped out of way just in time to avoid Yahiko. Stupid kid. I don't know what he was doing, but it looked oddly like he was trying to catch me...again. Damn, do these idiots ever give up?

"And you attacked me because...?" I asked expectantly. He got up, and looked at me all serious like, his eyes unwavering and yet scared. Hah. The way I intimidate people when I haven't even done anything can be pretty funny sometimes. All I do is glare and they suck in their stomachs and hold their breath. It's kinda weird, but funny.

"Because...I don't want...you t-to hurt Kaoru!" he stuttered nervously. I almost laughed. Almost.

"Boy, if I wanted to hurt Kaoru, she would be de–I mean! Why the hell would I want to do that?" Oops. That was a close one!

"I-I don't know, because you're...Battousai and you...you're crazy! Kenshin wouldn't ask Ugly out just like that w-without w-warning! You're either planning to hurt her or to...r-ra-rape her! And I'm not gonna let it h-happen!"

I had to admit, the boy was pretty brave for standing up for Kaoru and getting all protective and what-not, but was _that_ really necessary? Rape Kaoru? What did these people think, that all I wanted was to see blood and have sex? Come on, can't somebody take somebody else out on a little date without getting accused of being up to something?

Okay, so maybe I was up to something, but not like that! And crazy!? I'm not crazy! So what if I have two people in my head? That doesn't mean I'm crazy! I'll show you, I'll show you all crazy! You'll regret the day you ever mocked Battou--

Suddenly, Sano walked into the scene, clapping Yahiko on the shoulder. "Don't worry, kid," he said, grinning stupidly. It didn't surprise me; everything that dumb rooster does ends with the word 'stupidly'. He looked at me and I looked back. "You know Jou-chan's gonna figure out that you've gone Battousai eventually, yeah? She's no idiot..."

No, but you sure are–Wait! Was he actually supporting me? Okay, so he's a little smarter than he looks, but can you blame me for assuming? I mean, look at his hair!

"Yes, I know that," I answered.

"And you know Kenshin isn't going to stay down for long, right?"

Whoa. He caught on a lot faster than I thought. I wish the other me caught on that fast; I might not have to be standing here today if he did. "Your point?"

"Wait!" Yahiko suddenly broke in, turning around and grabbing Sano's arms, shaking them. "What are you doing?! You're not going to actually let him take her out, are you? Are you crazy?! We might never see her again, and he might h-hurt her!"

Now that was just a little unfair. In fact, I'll have you know, kid, that I've been the perfect role-model of self-control for the past hour or so!

"I told you not to worry, kid..."

"I'm not a kid!"

"Kenshin won't let that happen..." Sano finished. Oh, yeah, just talk about me like I'm not here, I won't care. Even when I do something good for these people, they just can't accept the fact that I'm not all killing and death and stuff. I have feelings, too, ya know!

Though I choose to ignore them sometimes...but still!

"Okay, I'll give you some money to take Kaoru out..." Yes! Problem solved. I was considering the possibility of saying thank you when he added, "...but I don't have any right now, so you'll have to wait 'til tomorrow. In the mean time, you should try and do something about your appearance and your...speech. Oh, and your eyes! Don't let her see your eyes!"

Okay, who was running this date here, me or this dumb rooster? I suddenly realized what Sano was saying. My clothes and speech I could handle, but my eyes? I asked, "What about my eyes? What's the matter with them?"

"They're amber..."

"So?"

Sano was staring at me like I was an idiot. There is no way in hell the tables just turned on me. I am not an idiot. Maybe _he_, that is the other me, is an idiot, but certainly not me.

"They're usually purple," Sano said. What? How did I change eye color? And _purple_?! If the other me wanted to change eye color behind my back, he could've picked something else like blue or something, not a girly color like purple. Like I said before, not much to work with, here!

"Well, what am I supposed to do about it?"

"I don't know. Wear a hat or something." Stupid brainless moron. If I wore a hat I'd look stupider than I already looked. And boy did I look stupid. I wasn't doing it on purpose. It was the rurouni, I tell you! If it wasn't one thing it was the other thing. For example, if you can even get past the fact that he wears pink, then it's the laundry and all those other dumb chores he does. If you can get past that, then it's the stupid purple eyes. And if you're still even the slightest bit attracted after _that_, then it's the–

"Here, I'm gonna go get the money now. Kid–"

"I'm not a kid!"

"Shut up and watch Kenshin and Kaoru and make sure nobody, and I mean _nobody_, finds out about...this."

"So you expect me to just sit here and do nothing and wait for you to come back," two people protested. Well, one was me. I looked down and realized Yahiko had said the same thing.

Sano looked surprised to hear us object. "Well, yeah... What else did you want to do?"

I rolled my eyes. "Well, maybe since I have no fuc–I mean! Since I don't know where the hell anything is in this place, not to mention where I'm going to take Kaoru, I thought I'd try and actually look around."

"Okay, then, look around. Kid..."

"I'm not a–"

"Yahiko, take him around and make sure _nobody_ finds out," he repeated, emphasizing that nobody word again. "And don't forget to tell Jou-chan that you left. Say you went to get tofu or something."

Sano left after that, leaving me and the obnoxious little kid together by ourselves. I looked at him and he glared back at me, like I was some sort of murderer. Okay, so maybe I cut a few throats during the war, but hello! It's war. That's what happens during a war. It's not to kill, or not to kill. That's not the question. The question is to kill, or to be killed. And I didn't want to get killed, even if it was all honorable and whatever. Who cares about honor if you're dead? I certainly...

Rambling again!? I need to learn to stop doing that.

I looked at him again. Oh, great. Now I had to drag this stupid kid around with me. "Okay," I said, starting to walk. He didn't follow me. Great. Did I have to spell everything out for this kid? "Come on. What are you waiting for?"

"I'm going to go tell Kaoru where we're going," he snapped. Okay. Rawr. Don't get all pissy and mad at me because_ I_ have to take you around. If you don't wanna come, don't. It's not like I wanted you around anyway!

Yahiko went inside to find Kaoru, so I sat down and thought for a while. Let's see...I could take Kaoru out to eat. I really hope I'm not a jealous person. No, not me. The other me. You know, the stupid one. Anyway, like I was saying, I hope I'm not a jealous person. What if I had to kiss Kaoru? Of course I wouldn't object if she wanted one, but I didn't want her to find out that I wasn't me. Well, I was me, just not me. Well, actually...

Okay, let's not get into that again. The point was that Kaoru was cute and I wouldn't hesitate to kiss her, but like that stupid rooster said, I wouldn't stay down for long. No, not me, for the last time! The other me! And if I, that is, he gets all pissy and whatever, things might screw up and then I'd be right back where I started and one idea short of escaping here a little more often.

Suddenly Yahiko came back outside, a frown on his face. Dumb kid. Just because you're in a bad mood doesn't mean you have to try and piss me off. "Okay, let's go."

I stood up and started walking, not saying a word. This was going to be a long day.

AN-This might be longer than I intended. Maybe about three more short, two-three page chapters left, and that's it. Romance will be in later chapters, though it will be slightly crude and more humorous than romantic.Thanks for sticking with me, all who did! I appreciate it!


	5. Chapter 5

AN-Plot? I'm getting to it.

Warnings-OOC

Disclaimer-I don't own RK in any way, sort, shape, or form. Well, unless you count the way I own it in my head.

The town wasn't all I thought it was. All the restaurants were too damn expensive, and the people weren't all that friendly, either. They kept staring at me like I was different. Hasn't anyone ever seen an assassin before? Obviously not. Stupid people. I glared right back and most of them quickly averted their gazes like the cowards they were.

I was contemplating if I should buy Kaoru a gift when someone's aura caught my attention. I stopped and I felt Yahiko run into me.

"Hey! What are you doing?!"

"I know him..." I slowly scanned the street until my eyes caught a hold of a particular man in a police uniform. "That's–"

"Oi! S-Saitou!" Yahiko broke in, interrupting me. Saitou? Oh, yeah! I thought he was that other guy I fought a long time ago. Maybe they're related, or something... Yahiko's hand suddenly closed around mine and he started pulling me away. "Quick, follow me!"

He pulled me into an alley and peered around the corner. "Oi, that was a close one..."

"What are you doing?" I asked, joining him and looking around the corner. He pushed me back.

"Don't let Saitou see you! If he knows you're Battousai he'll want to fight you!"

"So? If he wants to die it's fine with both of me." That sounded really weird. Oh, well. I meant to say that both I and me–that is, the rurouni and me–both hated Saitou with a passion. If you ask me, cutting him into little pieces would do us both, if not the whole world, a favor.

"Are you nuts?! Last time you fought him you almost died!"

"Well, that was only because I wasn't fully in control. Besides I lived, didn't I? He probably cheated anyway, that damn bastard..."

"Aiee! H-He's coming! Don't let him see your eyes! Act natural!"

I frowned. This whole 'hide your eyes!' thing was ticking me off. "I _am_ acting natural. You're the one acting like a mental idiot."

"No, act like Kenshin!"

"I _am _Kenshin."

I smirked as Yahiko began pulling at his hair, frustrated. "Act like the other you, I don't know! Just don't let him know that you're Battou–uh, I mean, that you're...uhm...late."

"What?" I looked and realized that Saitou was just rounding the corner. Yahiko put his back to him and started making weird motions to me. He kept covering his eyes. I caught on and looked down, my long bangs covering my face. Having long hair was proving to be useful at this point. I knew it would be a good idea to grow my hair out!

"Well, well, well, if it isn't Battousai..." I heard him say in an mocking sort of tone. I just barely remembered that my other side hated being called that. I don't know why. It didn't bother me at all. In fact, I thought it was pretty fun– "What the hell are you doing?"

I tried to sound mad. "None of your fuckin–"

"Nothing!" Yahiko broke in hurriedly. "We aren't doing anything!" I felt him elbow me all worried like, and I wondered what I was doing wrong. What? I was acting mad, just like my other side would do if Saitou came along and ruined my day! Stupid kid, make up your mind! "In fact, we were just leaving!"

I smiled, watching the cop's eyebrows raise from behind my bangs. That's right, I said none of your fucking business, you dumb ass. Then it occurred to me that the other me would have never said that, even if he was mad, but it also occurred to me that the other me also let Saitou walk all over him just because he was a police officer. Psh. No one walks all over Battousai, that's for sure!

But then I remembered that I was supposed to make a good impression, not a smart one. So I cleared my throat and was about to speak when Yahiko suddenly elbowed me hard again. I bit my lip to prevent any curses from breaking free. Stupid kid. If I wasn't trying to impress me I would've kicked your ass by now.

"Kenshin can't talk right now, he, uhm...has a cold, uh...laryngitis, sore throat, all of that stuff... Yeah, er, very dangerous; contagious, ya know... So we'll just be leaving now to pick up some...medicine and stuff..." He started pushing me past Saitou, who looked at me skeptically.

"Is that so?" he asked, his squinty eyes narrowed even further, if that's possible.

"Ye–That it is," I said, fake coughing afterward.

"Isn't that fox friend of yours a doctor?"

"Who?"

"Yes!" Yahiko shouted. "But she told us to pick up some ingredients for the medicine, so we'll just be on our way now!" And with one more shove, he pushed past Saitou and out into the crowded street. I turned to face him.

"Dammit, boy, if you push me one more time..." I suddenly remembered Saitou was standing there. Oops. I looked at him, raising my head just enough so he could see my face. His eyes widened for a second, and then he smirked, reaching for his katana.

"_Run!_" Yahiko grabbed my hand and started to do just that, pulling me with him. Of course, I wasn't one to run from a fight, but being that dicing Saitou into cold cuts would make me look so bad it would be a miracle if the rurouni would ever go to sleep again, let alone get knocked out, I decided to let this one slip. Unfortunately, that bastard didn't agree and he started chasing us, shouting incoherent curses and what-not. I waved to him before starting to run a little faster. I hate that asshole.

Luckily, there was a lot of people out that day, and before long we lost him in the crowd. Afterward, we found another conveniently placed alley to sit and catch our breath in. Actually, I wasn't all that tired. It was that stupid kid who was sweating bullets and panting like a dog.

"That was...so close!" he gasped.

I rolled my eyes, tapping my foot impatiently. "Are you done yet?"

Before he could answer, the door next to us slid open and Sano, of all dumb people, stepped out, his hands in his pockets, grinning like an idiot. He noticed us there and jumped slightly. "Holy crap, what are you doing here!?"

"Waiting for you," I said, cutting Yahiko off, for once. "What are you doing?"

"Getting your money," he responded with a sly smile, shaking his bulging pockets. They jingled. He suddenly looked up at the sky. "It's getting dark." You don't say?! Idiot. "You better get back to the dojo before Jou-chan starts to suspect something. Did ya get a good idea of where you're going to take her?"

I thought of all the places I went. I didn't go to very many places, but that was mainly because Yahiko held me up when he showed me this one restaurant. He had to stay and flirt with his little girlfriend, who just happened to work there. Stupid hormonal kids.

"No," I finally said. Sano sighed.

"Well, you still have 'til tomorrow." I know, I'm not an idiot, like you! Stupid rooster. "What are you going to do about your clothes?"

I ground my teeth furiously. "I don't know, and right now I don't really care. Listen, can we just go back now? I'll worry about all this crap later. I've been through enough shit today..."

Sano shrugged, backing off. "Okay, okay. But if you don't want Jou-chan to figure it out, you might want to consider trying to talk formally."

I sighed. Dammit, rurouni, you better be listening to all this crap I'm going through for you... Okay, so maybe I was going through it for me (the real me, that is), but at least he (that is, the other me) will get something good out of it, too."Okay, fine."

After that, we headed back toward the dojo. Sano left us before we got there, saying he needed to 'do something really fast.' Yeah, right. I swear if that idiot doesn't have my money by tomorrow I'm going to chop his head off. I could just imagine him running around without a head like a decapitated chicken. Come to think of it...he is a chicken.

When we finally arrived at the dojo, I let Yahiko go inside first, because I sensed some sort of tension going on inside. I think it had something to do with Kaoru. It wouldn't surprise me. We had taken a long time to 'get the tofu,' and we didn't even get any. Thusly, any anger she might be harboring will be vented out on Yahiko, and not me. Well, he deserved it anyway. He was the one said we were going to get some (tofu! We were going to get some _tofu_, not..._that_) in the first place. Besides, the rurouni gets beaten up enough as it is. I mean, have you seen some of the–

Okay, shutting up.

Surprisingly enough, Kaoru didn't beat up Yahiko, nor did she regard our presence. At first, anyway. She did eventually take the whole Yahiko bait thing when he finally approached her; she whaped him around the head with a wooden spoon. I snuck quietly past them on the sidelines of the "scuffle." I tried not to stare; Kaoru has no idea that she's really cute when she's mad. I think she was starting to grow on me. Thank goodness the rurouni didn't fall for an–

"Ugly old hag!" Yahiko yelled, breaking away from Kaoru and sprinting out of the kitchen. I took that as my cue and started to walk toward my room.

Actually, it took me a little while to determine which room was mine. Stupid confusing rooms...why couldn't they put name-tags on their doors? I eventually found it, though. Kaoru's was messy and her clothes were everywhere, so I knew the second I walked in that one it wasn't mine.

My original plan to find out what exactly the rurouni had to work with, in terms of clothing, that is, faded away when I saw the futon sitting there in the middle of the floor. I was really tired... So I walked right past the futon and sat against the wall, setting the stupid reversed-blade sword over my shoulder and closing my eyes.

Tomorrow...tomorrow was the day. I couldn't wait. Finally, Kaoru and me (the other me...how many times must I tell you?) would see me for who I really was: a _nice_, _caring_, and _thoughtful_ person...who didn't go insane and kill people every two seconds, which was the impression they seemed to be getting.

I fell into a semi-deep sleep. After all, if I fell into a really deep sleep, some deranged idiot might try and kill me on behalf of one of their family members that I accidentally killed in terms of self-defense during the war. Like I said, self-defense. Meaning they attacked me first. If they start something they should be able to finish it. And since they couldn't, they deserved what they got. Besides, I made sure it was quick and painless. I didn't torture them or anything, but if did, then I would understand why their family would want reven–

Okay. I'll go to sleep now.

AN-This is probably the second longest chapter you'll see in this story. Two chapters left. Thank you to those who support this silly little scrap of a story. It's the only reason I update it. Thanks a lot, reviewers, you inspire me the most!


	6. Chapter 6

AN-It looks long, but actually, it's word count is "average," for this story. Thank you so much for support! You all rock!

Warnings-OOC, rating change (PG-13). By the way, this is _only_ for cussing and stuff, not for any "suggestive" themes, so stay cool, okay?

Disclaimer-I don't own RK. But then again, if you haven't realized that by at least now, then you shouldn't even be reading this far, anyway.

I was aware someone was there the second they walked into the room; however, I wasn't able to react until that someone broke my personal space, which was an approximate three-foot radius. Even though I couldn't really sense a threat, my fist met with that someone's face, causing them to stagger back and hit the floor, cussing. I opened my eyes, lifting my head just enough to see past my bangs. "May I help you?"

Sano sat up, rubbing his nose. "Damn. Somebody woke up on the wrong side of the..." He stopped and looked at me, noticing that I was sitting on the floor. "...of the... uh... Well, someone's not a morning person."

So what if I wasn't? My eyes noted the color of the walls; it couldn't have been any later than midnight, give or take a few hours. No wonder I was so tired. I narrowed my eyes at the idiot sitting on the floor. "What the hell–"

"Nah-ah-ah!" Sano quickly said, cutting me off, shaking his finger at me. "Kenshin doesn't cuss...normally, anyway."

I watched his finger, having the strangest urge to hack it right off his hand. Damn chicken. "What–"

"Shh! I've come to teach you how to act like Kenshin, seeing as you'll blow your cover the minute you leave the dojo, if not sooner."

"I already know how to–"

"Not by the sound of it."

I closed my eyes and counted slowly to ten. If that dumb rooster didn't stop interrupting me, I was going to hack his body into little pieces and eat them.

Holy shit. Okay, pretend I didn't say that.

I stopped counting, ending up at sixty-two and sighed frustratingly. "What time is it?" I snapped.

"The time Kenshin usually wakes up. He then makes breakfast for everyone..."

"Yes, I know 'my' daily routine. And I hate every fuc–"

"'Ey!"

"–freaking minute of it. Besides, _I_ don't cook." I finished, ending that ridiculous idea before it even started. There was no way in hell I was going to cook something.

"But Kenshin usually..."

"No."

"But you..."

"No."

"But..."

"No."

He opened his mouth again.

"No."

"Jou-chan will be pissed if you don't."

That actually presented a small problem. Sano must've come to the conclusion I was thinking it over, rather than snapping 'no', and he grinned.

"Let the lessons begin..."

So that's how I found myself sitting there, a knife in hand, chopping up carrots and an assortment of other dumb vegetables. However, it was perfect therapy. I grinned to myself, imagining that the stupid food resembled everyone I hated, the number one person on my list being Sano. I got a little carried away and pretty soon all the carrots were nothing but mutilated shreds of orange. Oh, well. Close enough.

Well, I was busy chopping up Saitou the potato, when I cut myself. "Fuck!" Something collided with the back of my head.

"Shhh! You want Jou-chan to hear you?" Sano's voice hissed from behind me. "And don't cuss!" He had been 'helping' me; in other words, he had been barking orders from over my shoulder every damn second. Luckily, he had stopped when I started chopping, going off to check if anyone had woken up.

I ground my teeth, roughly hacking Saitou into a million little pieces. I hate Saitou, I hate potatoes, I hate roosters, I hate cooking, I hate everything... The knife became a blur of silver and the chopping board was spewing splinters and pieces of potato.

"Okay, Kenshin, that's enough...okay...stop already... Dammit, the potato is freakin' dead already! Calm down!" Sano finally shouted, grabbing my hand. I grudgingly swept Saitou's remains into the pot of boiling water, glaring at them.

The next thing I had to do was make some stupid little rice ball animals. Sano was making me mad, so I had to count to ten. That didn't work, so I counted to one thousand, six hundred, twenty-two, and it _was_ working...but then I lost count and I had to start all over again, which really pissed me off. Let's just say it was a hopeless cause to make little happy rice animals when one is pissed. They all looked cross-eyed and dead, anyway. And, just to make sure, I used kitchen-knife-chopping-ryu and sent them to rice heaven before using my foot to grind them into the dirt outside. I kinda regretted that afterward, because then Sano made me clean it up and rambled on how much of a waste of rice that was.

After breakfast was somewhat done, Kaoru woke up along with Yahiko. Sano told me to stay quiet for most of breakfast, which I did. Sano must've pulled Yahiko into our plans as well, because they fought loudly over breakfast, stuffing their faces with the food that I slaved over for hours. Me? No, my appetite had long since disappeared after I remembered that the food consisted of diced Saitou, Sano, and other random people that stared at me yesterday. I don't eat people.

Anyway, due to Sano's witty (pft! _Witty_?! Sano, witty?! I crack me up!) distraction, Kaoru didn't get a chance to say anything to me, which was probably what would've happened anyway, because Kaoru refused to meet my eyes, embarrassment written clearly all over her features. Which is good, because then she would've noticed that I had amber eyes. Which, in my opinion, is a far better color than purple!

Let's not get into that loop again, though.

After that, Sano commanded I do laundry.

Oh, hell no. Battousai doesn't do no damn laundry, that's for sure.

Unfortunately, the rurouni did, in all his stupid girly glory, and I had to pay for it. However, the laundry tub was "broken," due to, ahem...some unknown force. However, I didn't realize this until I had lugged two buckets of water to the damn thing. Stupid Sano said I should pretend I was doing laundry, anyway, so I sat down by the tub and began carving the words 'I hate life' into the ground with a stick.

"Okay," Sano suddenly said. I glanced up at him, glowering angrily.

"What now?" I snapped. He sat across from me.

"Now we are going to practice talking like Kenshin. Here, pretend I'm Jou-chan..."

"Okay." I sucked my teeth, staring at Sano with my eyebrows furrowed, contemplating. "How about this: 'Hello, Miss Kaoru. I hate you, that I do. This unworthy one recommends you do us all a favor and go jump off a cliff.'"

Sano thought that over. He was probably considering actually doing it, the big moron. "Well, if you take out the I hate you part and the cliff part, then that was a pretty good first try!"

I rolled my eyes. Idiot.

"Okay, for real now. I'm Kaoru. Hello, Kenshin, how are you?"

For real? I don't think he heard me the first time. "None of your business, that it isn't, you dumb broad."

"Oh, come on, you've got to at least try first. Just remember that you're doing it for Jou-chan, not me!"

I breathed deeply, trying to focus. "Fine."

"Hey, Kenshin. How are you?"

"Fine."

"You can't just say one word."

"Why?"

"Because then she'll think something's bothering you."

"Something is bothering me."

"Well, don't let her know that! You've got to act happy."

"I am. When I'm mad, I don't say anything. When I'm happy, I say one word. Deal with it."

"Think of Kaoru."

Dammit. That was a cheap trick. "This unworthy one is having the time of his life, that he is," I grumbled, crossing my arms over my chest. Stupid rooster. "There. Happy?"

"Close enough. Let's go over some normal conversation..."

So then we spent half the damn day talking and arguing over what I sounded like. Sano cheated every time, using my attraction to Kaoru as a weapon, saying "Think of Kaoru" every time I objected to something. By the time Sano was finally satisfied, I had doodled some very interesting artwork into the ground, some of the drawings involving a decapitated rooster running around with a sword stabbed in its back and a cute little Kaoru. I eventually scratched that one out, though. If Kaoru saw what her cartoony counterpart was wearing she'd probably beat me up.

Speaking of which, I then had to pick out something to wear. Well, being the penniless rurouni my other side was, I only had a few crappy articles of clothing to pick from. One I recognized from forever ago; a dark blue gi and a gray hakama. Sano told me to wear that. How typical. I had been "training" all day under His Majesty Stupidness not to act like, look like, or remotely resemble Battousai in any way, shape, or form, and now I was going to dress exactly like this said person, this said person being me, of course. Whatever happened to just 'being yourself'?

So, after taking a much needed bath and getting all dressed up and whatever, Sano finally left me alone, after a few parting words...

"Here," he said, handing me a handful money. "I already saw Jou-chan. When you see her, don't stare and drool like an idiot, because I kinda stared and she hit me. Besides, Kenshin wouldn't do that."

I snatched the money and eyed him suspiciously. "You're planning on stalking us, or something, aren't you?" His eyes widened a little bit, then he scratched the back of his head stupidly.

"You're awfully perceptive. I just don't want anything to go wrong."

I didn't think 'perceptive' was in his monosyllabic vocabulary. "Something _will_ go wrong if you follow us."

"Fine," he said, no truth at all in his voice. "We won't 'stalk' you."

"We?"

"I mean I! _I_ won't stalk you."

I narrowed my eyes at him and turned to leave. Dammit. If I detect even the slightest trace of that dumb rooster, I'm going to throttle him the next morning.

I walked outside, muttering about how much I hate Sano, when I suddenly noticed Kaoru was standing there.

She was wearing a white kimono that looked silver in light, in this case, the moonlight. Little flowers colored black and blue were dancing around the folds of it, matching her blue obi. Her hair was done up all confusing like, not that I was complaining. Wow. It just occurred to me how long it must take for women to get ready. I mean, they have to wrap themselves into those multilayered kimonos, then they have to tie that confusing obi, which would probably take the long side of two hours, and then they have to pull their hair up into that confusing hair-do, which would probably take me the long side of a thousand years, and then there's all that make-up crap they put on their face...

I must've been staring a lot longer than I thought, because Kaoru said, "Kenshin? Are you okay? You...you look really nice..."

I opened my mouth, but no sound came out, so I shook my head and cleared my throat. "You look beautiful, Miss Kaoru," I eventually said, my voice a little low. She blushed and got all pretty, mumbling something along the lines of 'thank you.' There. How's that for smooth? Ha. Piece of cake. I offered her my hand and she took it, still looking a little nervous.

This date was going to be easy...

AN-Almost done. Next chapter should be the last one...aw, I'm gonna miss this...but, there might me an extra needed chapter if I can't finish it in that time, if not an epilogue or something. Thanks to all who supported. I would be nothing if it weren't for you! Thanks so much!


	7. Chapter 7I think

AN-Want an excuse rant, aka explanations? Go to my profile, 'cause this chapter's long enough without one.

Warnings-OOC, written on Wordpad in rich text thingy, which I have no idea if it works on here. Human spell checker used, so report all punctuation, spelling, whatever mistakes in your review and I'll eventually fix it. Thanks.

Disclaimer-Don't own RK. Okay, I've said it about one billion (7) times.

It was a quiet walk, for the most part. I wasn't complaining; the silence allowed me to concentrate on more important things. Things like Kaoru, and the way her cute little face turned pink when I grabbed her hand. The way the moonlight reflected off her hair and skin, giving her an ethereal appearance. The way her kimono fitted her so well.

And the way her lips looked in the moonlight, and in every other possible light. Damn. Her hair, her skin, her kimono, her _everything_ was glowing with soft white light, and I wanted to touch everything _but_ her hand. No offense to her hand or anything, which was very soft in itself, but the other choices seemed a tiny bit more enjoyable.

Damn, again. That's when it occurred to me that ten years is a really long time. I honestly don't know how my other side survived for so long without the touch of a woman. And let's not forget how long he's lived with Kaoru without making any sort of move. I mean, really, look at her. How can you possibly not...

Okay. I think that's enough.

As I was saying, I had a lot of time to stare at her. Unfortunately, Kaoru-gazing, while a thoroughly enjoyable hobby, also had a bad side: you tend to forget where you're going and end up walking and walking...and walking. And by the time you realize you've been wandering around aimlessly...

"Kenshin..."

...your date has also come to that conclusion.

"Where are we?"

Damn it. I looked around, trying to mentally backtrack. Hmm...there were some trees...and a creek...some rocks, oh, and there's another tree... Which way had we came from, again?

Before I could answer and tell Kaoru we were hopelessly lost, she suddenly gasped. I whirled around, thinking she had hurt herself, only to find her staring blankly at the creek and all of the stupid fireflies that were buzzing around. Stupid bugs.

Apparently Kaoru liked those stupid bugs, because she couldn't take her eyes off them. She slowly approached the edge of the creek, hypnotized. I thought she was going to walk right into it, so I grabbed her upper arms. She stopped and leaned on me, sighing.

"Oh, Kenshin..." she whispered, her voice sounding far away. "It's so beautiful..."

It is? I double-checked. It looked like a plain old creek to me... Maybe I was missing something...

I looked back down to Kaoru. Ah, so that's what I missed! My advantage in height and our proximity gave me a nice view of her face and her tit-I mean! her. Ahem, a nice view of her face and _her_.

Kaoru didn't seem to notice me staring, being that she was preoccupied with the fireflies. They must've meant something, but I had yet to figure out just what that was.

"It's beautiful," she repeated, apparently too awed to say anything else.

"Yeah she is," I said on impluse. I bit my lip. Oops. She tensed, finally snapping out of her trance.

"Thank you...but..." She hesitated. Oh, crap. Whenever women do that they always have bad news. They use the word "but." No, not butt, but. It's like they can say something that gets your hopes all up...and then they just shoot you down like it's okay. Like, 'I love you with all my heart, _but_ I already have a boyfriend. I hope we can still be friends.' Yeah, like that. Uh, oh, that was probably what she _was_ going to say! Of course, that must be it. Why else would she be all quiet? She'd probably say something like, 'Kenshin, I know you'e liked me all this time and that you've been acting like an oblivious idiot for all this time so I wouldn't notice, and I have to tell you... I don't like you like that.' Of course, she'd let me down as nicely as possible. Then again, she might just go straight out and say...

"Why did you bring me here?"

See, I told you, I knew she didn't...wait...what'd she say? Why did I bring her here?

"I..." I suddenly stopped. I don't know. Why _did_ I bring her here? I didn't do it on purpose. I got lost... I couldn't think of anything to say. Of course I could simply say, 'I got us lost because you and your cute little body distracted me...' but I think that would be a little too straight forward. I said the only thing that came to mind.

"I thought you would like it..." I thought that was okay, but I must have offended her somehow, because she looked a little hurt. "...but it's okay if you don't! We can go back, I mean..."

"I love it," she said, a smile forming on her face, her big blue eyes turning back towards the creek...again. "...but..."

There it is again.

"...This place holds a lot of memories..." Her smile faded away. Memories...? I wonder what in the hell she is talking about. She looked really depressed. I wanted to wrap my arms around her and kiss all her troubles away. And then, when she got all happy again, I could just keep kissing her anyway...mmm...

"Uhm...Kenshin...what are you doing?" Kaoru suddenly said out of nowhere. I realized I had started sort of massaging her upper arms. Okay. I guess I'd better stop thinking like that.

"Sorry," I muttered, resisting the urge to continue to "massage" her arms. I was also going to let her go, but suddenly I couldn't. I knew if I did I'd probably go insane. My hands had to have some sort of contact with her for some unknown reason.

"It's okay..." She smiled. She looked a little happier than before, but still not by much. What was it about this place that made her feel so bad?

Something inside of me said it was me. Not me, the other me. I frowned. I wouldn't be surprised. I always screw up everything. But then again...even though the other me does mess up a lot of things...he wouldn't purposely hurt Kaoru in any way. Well...there was that one time he left her for Kyoto, but that was diff...er...ent...hey...wait a minute...

That was this place, I remember! The stupid fireflies and the stupid water, I remember how the rurouni got all overly sappy and described it all! I double-checked yet again... Yes, this was it! No wonder Kaoru was all sad. She probably thought I was going to leave her, like last time!

...Oh, crap, again. Of all the places to get lost, I got lost here. Today was not my day.

I looked at Kaoru again. She was still sad. Damn it. I guess I better let her know I wasn't going to do any sort of leaving any time soon. I opened my mouth to speak when suddenly I felt another presence.

My eyes flickered toward the patch trees on my left. Ah ha.

I leaned forward over Kaoru's shoulder. "I'll be right back, Miss Kaoru," I said in a low voice. She merely nodded, her eyes downcast.

"I'll be right here..."

I gently released her and walked up to the trees, weaving in between them until I came to the one. The one that concealed our audience...

"Hey, I have to tell..."

My hand shot out and grabbed his collar, pulling him down to my height. Being short could be a real pain in the ass, sometimes. "What the fuck are you doing here, Sano?"

He shrugged. "I was following you..." I felt my other hand unconsciously grip the sword hanging at my waist. "Wait! Before you beat me up, I have to tell you some news!"

"Okay," I growled, not really believing him. "What?"

"Saitou's looking for you! He's probably headed this way right now! Yahiko told me about how he had seen you and..."

I let go of his shirt and he staggered backwards. "What? You mean like right now?"

"Yes!" he said, nodding frantically. "You've got to get out of here."

"How the hell am I supposed to do that?"

"Don't cuss!" he hissed angrily. Suddenly, he looked thoughtful. "I dunno, start walking in the other direction?"

I ground my teeth. "No, you smart ass, I mean how am I supposed to leave without Kaoru suspecting anything?"

"I don't know, but you better come up with something quick..." I rolled my eyes and sighed, resisting the urge to smack that idiot upside the head. Of course Sano wouldn't be able to think of anything. He's an upside-down-headed moron. "Listen, just get her out of here. Take her to a restaurant or something. I'll make sure the asshole doesn't follow you. It's too late for now, though, so..."

"What are you saying?"

"I'm saying I have it under control. Just take Jou-chan and go..."

"Kenshin? What are you doing? Are you okay?" I glanced back toward the opening of the trees, where I had left Kaoru. I glared back at Sano, who nodded toward her as well.

"I'll take you up on that one...but...if you screw up any way, I'll have your fucking--"

He sucked his teeth violently, glaring.

"--head on a platter..." I narrowed my eyes at him as he nodded again. Finally turning away, I walked back through the trees, only to meet Kaoru halfway there already.

"Who are you talking to?" she questioned, blinking her beautifully distracting eyes at me, looking more curious than anything else. Ah, yet another emotion she looked good in...

"Nothing," I said quickly. "I mean, nobody! I am talking to_ nobody_, which is the opposite of...somebody..." Ooh, should've stopped while I was ahead. She narrowed her eyes at me, obviously doubting my answer. Who wouldn't? I babbled like an idiot.

"Kenshin," she began, a firm tone in her voice. "Are you lying to me?"

"No, whatever gave you that idea?"

"You did."

Should've seen that one coming. Thinking quickly, I grabbed her hands and held them up. Kaoru's eyes widened, and I tried to conceal my amusement. "Listen, Miss Kaoru, this unworthy one is very sorry. I shouldn't have brought you here, but I..." I suddenly felt it. Saitou... Shit. Better get out of here...

"K-Kenshin?" she said hoarsely.

I quickly directed my attention back at her. "I'm sorry. I guess I just..." Uh...I just... Shit, shit, think, think! Ah, idea! "...I just wanted to make sure you knew that what happened was in the past...and I have no intention of doing that again. As long as I am welcome...I'll stay by your side..." There. Now that that's over, we can leave...

I looked at Kaoru to confirm if she bought it or not (hey, it wasn't a lie, okay!? It was the truth rushed!), only to find her staring straight into my eyes. I don't think she could tell mine were amber and if she did, she thought nothing of it.

"You are always welcome..." she said softly. Saitou was getting closer, I could feel it, but for some reason I didn't care right then...

"Then I guess I'll stay with you forever..." I found my voice saying for me. Okay, enough fooling around, voice and Kaoru, time to leave!

Kaoru obviously had other plans. Her eyes slid halfway shut. "I guess you will..." she replied, her voice low and seductive. I don't think she meant to do it, but she did, and I can tell you right now that the second she finished that sentence I was turned on. I squeezed her hands, trying not to think of her lips and how bad I wanted to feel them under mine, but feeling her soft white hands made me think of what they could do to me...damn... I needed to focus on something else. Like how Saitou was getting closer and closer. Or maybe how Kaoru was getting closer and closer, that was always an alternative.

Wait, what?! Her eyes weren't even open anymore and her head was tilted to the side as she moved in closer... S-She was going to kiss me!

...Mmm, sounds good to me...

I mean, no! I want to, damn, how I want to, but I can't! Not now, anyway... Her hands slid up on my shoulders and I barely managed to stifle a groan. I started breathing really hard. Shit, she was an inch away, she smelled so good, she looked so good, she probably tasted even better...ah...

Stop it! Saitou's right around the corner, get your ass in gear and go!

I found myself jerking away from her, shaking my head. Her eyes snapped open.

"Oh, Kenshin, I'm so sorry, I couldn't help it..." she stuttered, her face, though I couldn't see it too well in the dim light, as red as a cherry. A cute, delicious cherry, no doubt... Shut _up_, damn it!

"No, don't be..." I stopped, footsteps coming deadly close. No time for explainations now. I bent down and slid my arm around her knees, then stood up. She fell backwards and I caught her back with my other arm. Good, she was as light as a feather. And soft as one, too...ah...silky...

Stop it! Focus, focus!

Kaoru's arms wound around my neck automatically and she cried out my name breathlessly, which really didn't help me focus. Well, it did, in a way...it helped me focus more on her, which wasn't too bad, but...

"Battousai!" Saitou's dumb voice cut through my thoughts like a sharp sword. Heh heh, sword, Saitou, get it?

Okay, enough messing around. I racked my brains and said what came to mind first... "Oh my God, is that Tokio?!"

Saitou actually turned around. "Where?" he said dumbly. I bolted out of there as fast as I could, which was pretty fast, if I do say so myself. It probably would've been faster if the stupid trees had not been there.

I remembered that I had no idea where we were, so I just turned wherever there was a place to turn. In other words, I ran a random, loopy course through all the houses in hopes of losing Saitou, who was right at my heels, cussing.

"Kenshin, w-what are y-you doing?" Kaoru asked shakily. I glanced down at her. She was all wind swept and flushed. Ooh, better look away. "W-Was that Saitou?"

"Yes!" I shouted in response and surprise, narrowly avoiding some drunken idiots on the street. Hello, who was even up at this hour?!

...Okay, so me and Kaoru were up at this hour, but still!

I was doing just fine until I came up to the stupid river. Of course, it just had to be there. It couldn't be somewhere else, it just _had_ to be in _my _way at that _exact _time. The instant I saw it, I thought of two choices: one, stop and face Saitou with Kaoru in my arms, or two, jump the river and hope to make it safely to ther other side. I looked over my shoulder and suddenly realized Saitou wasn't there anymore. I was running from nothing...? I stopped, but I guess with the added weight of Kaoru and the speed I was going at, I couldn't stop fast enough. I stopped running, but I kept sliding...and sliding...

I kinda blanked out when I realized my feet weren't on solid ground. Well, _that_ certainly wasn't part of my plans...

The water hit me before the realization did. Somebody screamed. Oh, shit; Kaoru wasn't in my arms anymore.

It wasn't hard to find my way back to shore, seeing as I was already sitting on top of it. The river wasn't that deep by the shore, and I was sitting in the shallow part. But Kaoru... I looked around, my eyes scanning the water. Oh, wait, she was right there next to me.

The look on her face was blank. It was like she couldn't seem to grasp the fact that she was sitting in knee-deep water, soaking wet. She raised her hand to her face, looking at it in a sort of absentminded daze. Shit, it was worse than if she was mad, which she probably would be soon. I decided to apologize, seeing as it was my fault. Besides, if I was lucky, she might not kick my ass _too_ hard...

"I'm so sorry, Miss Kaoru, I didn't mean for that to happen, it was an accident, and I'd completely understand if you hated me, because that was...I was..." I stuttered stupidly, stopping when I realized Kaoru was staring at me blankly. "...Kaoru? Are you okay?"

She scanned my body without speaking, taking a painfully long time to finish looking. I tried not to do the same to her. Then, she finally cracked.

She cracked...and went insane, I guess, because she started smiling. And laughing. A lot. I personally didn't think it was that funny. In fact, I didn't think it was funny at all. So I just sat there, confused, while she laughed at me.

I finally asked, "What's so funny?" She wiped her eyes and looked at me, smiling.

"You're...so...cute," she said between giggles. My eyebrows rose and my jaw dropped slightly.

"I...am?" I said dumbly, at a loss for words. She laughed at my reaction.

"Yes, you are..." she said, her voice turning soft again. Well, now that I knew she wasn't mad, my conscience was allowed to go wherever it wanted to. And it wanted to go to Kaoru. I couldn't help it; my eyes started roaming all over her, slowly processing her appearance. She was soaked and her kimono was sticking to her, leaving no room for imagination. Which was okay, because I don't think I could imagine anything that would look so pretty and flawless...and curvy.

I watched her reach up and pull the sticks from her hair and stick them in her obi, practically forgetting I was there. Rather than falling loosely around her shoulders, her hair mostly stayed place, seeing as it was wet. So she started pushing her beautifully long fingers through her hair, making my mouth run just the slightest bit dry... How unfair; I wanted to run my fingers through her hair, too! I bit my tongue, trying to bring myself back down to earth.

"Kenshin?" Kaoru suddenly said. She must've finally noticed me staring. "Are you alright?"

I nodded slowly, unable to talk. Breathe, damn it, breathe. Stop staring. Stop looking.

Before I could speak, Kaoru suddenly stood up and held her hand out to me. "Come on, let's go get cleaned up..." I couldn't take my eyes off her body. She was all wet and...ah...

Damn, again. If she didn't stop being all sexy and cute I was going to pass out. Her hand was still there waiting for me. I couldn't stop myself. Just once. Just once and that'd be it...

I grabbed her hand and yanked her back down with me. She fell right back into my lap, right where I wanted her. Her eyes were wide and she was breathing really fast. "K-Kensh--"

I cut her off with a kiss, cupping her delicate face between my hands. It was a while before she actually reacted. It was a short lived kiss, unfortunately, but damn, it was sweet. Besides, if I let myself go any further, I'd probably end up going a little _too_ far...

I opened my eyes, trying to hold myself back from kissing her again. Her eyes were half lidded. "Kaoru?" I groaned, my voice a little rough. She stared at me, her eyes unfocused and her face blank. Shit, I hope she doesn't start laughing at me again. Or worse, she might get mad and say...

"Kenshin!" she moaned suddenly, her eyes widening with an emotion I didn't have time to read; before I could, she had grabbed the front of my gi and slammed her lips on top of mine, pressing her body fully against me. I nearly fell backwards and I had to brace myself by putting my hands on the ground, which meant I couldn't use them to explore the rest of Kaoru. Damn, again. I guess I wasn't the only one turned on. Kaoru was a _naughty_ little kitty, wasn't she?

I have no idea how long we sat there making out, but I can tell you it was one of the best experiences of my life. I can also tell you that Kaoru did in fact taste better than she looked. No offense to how she looks, or anyhting, which is off the charts in itself, but, shit, I couldn't get over how freakin' sweet she was... I could safely live the rest of my life in happiness if I got to kiss a woman like Kaoru every night...

Hint, hint.

Well, we were still kissing when I felt Kaoru's stomach (which, I must remind you, was still pressed up against me) sort She ripped her lips off mine, leaving me in a dazed state.

"Whassamatter?" I babbled stupidly, blinking. Her face was all red. Cute. I cleared my throat. "What's the problem?"

"Nothing," she said quickly, untangling her hands from my hair and sitting up. "I'm just--" A growling noise interrupted her and I grinned as she blushed again. It was funny...we had just been kissing each other and yet she was more embarrassed at the noises her stomach made.

"Hungry?" I asked. She nodded timidly. "I could take you out to eat somewhere..." I decided not to tell her that was my original plan in the first place. After all, the way it came out was much better than what I planned.

"Could you?" she responded happily. Her expression turned into that of which a beggar would have. "I promise I'll pay you back..."

"No, it's fine..."

"I just don't have any money with me..."

"It's okay..."

"It's at home, I'll pay you the second we get back..."

"Kaoru!" I said loudly. She paused. "Don't worry about it, okay? It's fine... Actually..." Her smile faded as soon as I began hesitating. "Give me a kiss and we'll call it even, oka--"

Before I could even finish, she threw herself against me, her lips meeting mine, catching me off-guard. My back hit the shallow water, but I didn't really mind, seeing as my hands were free. I put them on her waist and began guiding them lower and lower... when she broke away from me, breathing fast. She sat up, grinning, my hands still low on her waist.

"There. We're even. Let's go," she said, standing up. I just sat there, my hands frozen in the position they had been in just two seconds ago, before she got up. I kinda felt ripped off, and the smile on Kaoru's face told me she had meant to do that. "Kenshin? You okay?"

"Yes, this unworthy one is just fine."

"Then why are you just lying there?"

"Just go back to the road and I'll be there in a minute."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Okay, be careful with whatever you're doing..." Kaoru turned and climbed up the semi-steep hill I had fell from, looking back at me worriedly. I nodded to her and she disappeared over the hill.

When I was sure she was gone, I knelt on my hands and knees over the water, staring at my reflection... And then I shoved my head under water, trying _not_ to think of Kaoru and how close I had been to groping her a--

Somebody grabbed the back of my gi and hauled me out of the water. "What are you doing?!" a feminine voice shouted, a voice I instantly recognized as Kaoru's. "Trying to drown yourself?!"

I shook my head rapidly, sending water everywhere. "Don't worry about me, Kaoru, I just..." I sighed. "Let's go get something to eat."

"Are you sure?" I nodded in response. She smiled, though I could tell she was still worried. "Okay... Let's go. I'm hungry!" She grabbed my hand and started pulling me after her, her previous shy mask gone. Apparently kissing opened her up. Had I known that I could've saved myself from a lot of mental torture and done it earlier.

I grinned, letting her pull me along. I was hungry, too, but I had an appetite for something a little different...

AN-Okay, I know. Don't tell me it's ridiculous, okay, because I know it is. By the way, this is not the end. Well, unless you want to make it the end, then go ahead and believe that, but to me, there's one more chapter. In short, THIS IS NOT THE END!! I just couldn't fit everything in here, despite it's long-ness. I seriously hope this is the longest chapter in this story, because it's really long to me. Thank you for all support, please don't give up me yet, I know it's been a long time, but... See excuse rant...

(**What the hell? I can't find the 8th chapter!!**--I know, it's retarded. Maybe it's just my computer, but just to be sure, here ya go... Go to your web browser where you type in titles(this is what it should say, without spaces--http:www. fanfiction .net/s/1885255/ 7/) and change the last 7 to an 8. Freakin' retarded, but that should work. Sorry 'bout the mix-up, guys!!)


	8. Chapter 8 finally

AN-Uh, so it's been a while...Oh, come on, Christmas, guys, Christmas! That should be enough excuse. Merry Christmas to all, unless you celebrate something else. Then happy (insert holiday/occasion) to you.

I couldn't concentrate on anything but her. Kaoru forgot about the concept of changing and we ended up eating in our wet clothes. Of course it didn't really bother me to sit in wet clothes when it's nearly the summer season, anyway, but sitting across from Kaoru in wet clothes was a different story...

I thought after we kissed and "broke the ice", it would be easier to resist staring, not to mention resist...fantasizing...about her. Boy, was I ever wrong. Now all I could think about was her, all I could look at was her, and it was quite obvious to passerby and the nosy waitresses that I was all I wanted for tonight...wasn't on the menu...

Of course, she was oblivious to my internal struggling, making her all the more attractive. She wasn't lying when she said she was very hungry, and she focused all of her attention on food. Not that she's a pig, or anything. Far from it, in fact. As a matter of a fact, she should eat more, she's so tiny. Not saying that she's too thin, or anything. Far from it, in fact. As a matter of a fact...

Rambling!? Aw, damn, just when I thought I was getting over it!

Like I was saying, we went out to eat. Well, actually, she ate, and I watched her every move. I could tell she was on edge because of my staring, but I couldn't take my eyes of her. It wasn't my fault! Her clothes were sticking to her like bare skin and her hair was grabbing to certain places that really distracted me.

It was the longest dinner I've ever experienced. When she finally filled that cute little flat stomach of hers, we left. The waitresses were all giggling and smiling at me. I wouldn't be surprised if I found one stalking us.

However, when we left, Kaoru's smile dropped and she looked just the slightest bit bothered.

"What's the matter?" I asked before I could stop myself. She looked at me, ashamed.

"I didn't mean to eat _that_ much," she said in a small voice. "I'm sorry, I must've spent all your money. And you didn't even get anything. I feel like such a pig..."

I bit my lip so I wouldn't bust out laughing. Of course, she had spent the majority of my money, but I wasn't about to tell her that. "No, you didn't spend all of my money, that you didn't. And even if you had, it wouldn't have mattered."

She didn't look very reassured. I probably should have left out that last sentence.

"You're too nice," she said after several minutes of silent thought.

"And you're too pretty," I replied without thinking. Shit. If I keep doing that I might tell her something I really don't her to hear. Like what I really wanted to do with her tonight.

"Thank you!" This time she sounded actually flattered, rather than embarrassed. I think she was finally starting to get comfortable with me. "Seriously, thank you so much for dinner. I'm so full and slee...sl..."

She cut herself off with a yawn. I smiled at her, but still felt a little guilty for making her walk the whole way. Of course, I had barely been able to pay for dinner, how the hell was I supposed to pay for transportation? Hmm...I think I have an idea...

I guess my idea leaked from my brain to my face in the form of an expression, because Kaoru was suddenly staring at me strangely, her eyes still half-lidded with exhaustion.

"Kenshin? Wh-Why are you looking at me like that?" she stuttered, suddenly nervous. I must've looked a little suspicious.

"No reason. You're just pretty to look at, that you are," I said before plucking her off the ground and carrying her away. She made a noise of surprise when I upended her and wrapped her arms around my neck on impulse like the first time.

"What're you doing!? Put me down!" she demanded with no real conviction whatsoever in her voice. I only grinned and kept walking as she "complained".

"I'm carrying you home because you're tired and it's all my fault," I finally admitted after she stopped struggling. The view was very nice from my position; her pout was too cute! And there were a few _other_ parts of her that were very cute, too...

She blinked in response to my answer and suddenly shook her head. She then said something, but I was too engrossed in the feel of her body in my arms and our proximity to hear what it was.

"Okay," I said stupidly when she stopped talking. She looked content and so I kept walking, but after a few minutes she frowned again.

"I thought you said you were going to put me down," she muttered quietly. My eyes, which were actually on the road lest we got lost again, snapped back to her.

"This unworthy one never said that."

"I asked you to put me down a few minutes ago and you said okay..."

"I must've been lying," I said absentmindedly before I could think about it. Damn. Chalk another one up for Kaoru. If she was my enemy she'd probably could've killed me about three million times; she's actually made me lose control of my bodily functions that many times.

Kaoru sighed, her muscles relaxing as she leaned her head against my shoulder and gave up. "You're so stubborn..." she murmured, closing her eyes. I laughed softly, trying not to stare now that she wasn't looking. I fixed my gaze on the road, glad that Kaoru had led us to eat at a restaurant that was in an area I was familiar with.

By the time I finally reached the dojo, my arms were asleep and so was Kaoru. I don't know how, but she had somehow managed to twist around in my hold and bury her face in my chest, one arm pulled up against her own chest between us and the other hanging limply over my elbow. She was softly snoring and mumbling things in her sleep. It was hilarious, but I didn't want to laugh and wake her up.

I had to drop Kaoru to open the gates or find an alternative. Preferably the latter. I looked around, trying to think of something...

Before I could attempt open the gates with my foot, Sano (of all the stupid people) opened them for me from the inside, grinning. He closed his open mouth, as soon as his eyes fell on Kaoru, but his smile got bigger and I knew what he was going to ask me the second I stepped out of her room.

I nodded my "appreciation" to him and he nodded back before running to open the door for me. He closed it after me and I had to feel the slightest bit grateful, but it didn't last long. My attention quickly refocused back on Kaoru as I walked through the already opened door to her room. And suddenly it occurred to me I had no idea what the hell I was doing.

My first intention had been to drop Kaoru off in her room and dump a cold bucket of water on my head before going to sleep myself. But if I simply put her into bed, then she'd surely get her futon wet with her clothes and she'd run a high risk of catching a cold. And we couldn't have Kaoru sick, now, could we?

No, we couldn't.

And then there was the simple solution of ripping her clothes off of her and...and...a-ah... I m-mean! I mean _taking_ off her clothes and dressing her in dry ones without staring, touching, looking, feeling, or...tasting...

But then again, if she woke up... Ah, I don't really want to know what would happen if she woke up. Knowing Kaoru, she'd probably...ouch. Damn, I really don't want to think of what she'd do to me. I'd be lucky to be castrated and my head cut off.

...It'd probably be worth it.

And then again I could avoid all of the above and simply wake her up.

I looked at the curled up angel in my arms again. She was adorable when she was sleeping! How could I wake something as beautiful as that!? And, speaking of which, how can someone be so innocent and yet so sexy and attractive at the same time? Baby-cute, but exotic. Pure, untouched, but at the same time erotic. It was impossible, but there was proof right there in my arms that it was in fact very much possible.

Not that I was complaining. As a matter of a fact, I was admiring the rare contradiction...

Anyways! As I was saying, I had three choices: let Kaoru sleep in wet clothes and catch a cold, wake her up, or redress her in new clothes. Choice two was impossible; I couldn't do it if I wanted to. Too cute. And as for choice one, I would never harm Kaoru intentionally if there wasn't any positive future in store for Kaoru at the end (which puts the whole Kyoto thing in the okay zone, even though it _was_ my _other_ side and not really _my_ fault...).

So that left choice three, which left me happy and yet...scared. The process would probably destroy our relationship as well as our friendship. And the whole emotional pain thing was something I wasn't really ready for.

And besides, there was that whole castrating thing. I may be Battousai and have all the most painful scars in the world, but it doesn't mean I particularly _enjoy_ getting the shit beat outta me.

I sighed. There was no other way.

I ignored the voice in my head that said, "yes, there was..." and sat down slowly, settling Kaoru in my lap. I then tried to gently ease her from my lap to her futon, but before I had her moved five inches she wove her fingers into the cloth of my gi and groaned an incoherent protest. Her limp arm, much to my dismay (yeah, right), came to life and wrapped tight around my arm and back where she embedded her fingers into the fabric there, too.

Okay. Now what? I bit my lip and looked down at her. Maybe...I could...sleep...with... Ah, no, not good, no way in hell it was going to happen. Maybe I wanted it to, but it wasn't going to. I couldn't. Fighting back my own desires, I slid my free arm between us and softly pulled at her wrist.

She moaned in response and held on tighter, mumbling...

"Kenshin, please...don't...don't leave me...alone..." she whispered. I bit back a groan and let go of her wrist, sliding it up to her shoulder. Was she dreaming?

"Kaoru?" I said quietly. She responded by hugging me tighter. I sucked my teeth violently; it was endearing, her hug, but it was quickly turning just the slightest bit uncomfortable. Not only was it pushing my mind back to spending the night with her, but it was cutting off my air supply. Oi, but Kaoru has quite a grip...

"I won't...hit you...anymore...I...I swear..." I chuckled and she tensed.

"What are you laugh–" Kaoru suddenly cut off and her head pulled back and twisted up to face me. "...l-la-laughing a-at...?" Her finishing tone was adorable and her face turned pink with embarrassment as she leveled her gaze with my chest.

And just as suddenly as she had stopped murmuring, she jerked away from me, untangling her limbs from me and backing away as best she could in her restricting kimono. It took a lot of effort, but she was so panicked she accomplished it in under three seconds. And by the end of those three seconds, she was on the other side of the room, hyperventilating and clutching at her heart.

Aww, she looked so cute! My hand had managed to pull the fabric of her kimono when she pulled away and her left shoulder was exposed, along with a little bit more of her...assets, and when she had struggled against her kimono's constrictions, it had pushed the fabric higher up her legs, revealing a considerable amount of skin.

Damn, she was killing me...

"I-I'm s-sorry, I was... I..." She swallowed hard and looked bashfully at me, apparently unaware of what she was doing--or more importantly wearing. "Did...did you...you didn't happen to hear anything I said, did you?"

My gaze shot back to her face and I smiled, swallowing what I wanted to say. "No, this unworthy one didn't hear anything except your snoring." Whoops! Didn't mean to say that, I really didn't mean to say that...

She blushed deeper, but a smile formed on her face. "Sorry, I can't help it..." she said quietly, edging slowly back toward me. That's when she finally noticed the abrupt change in her attire, and she jumped slightly, quickly grabbing at the fabric below her shoulder and pulling it back up. Her hand fastened over the kimono's opening at her chest, making her upper half appropriate. She didn't really pay any attention her legs, which wasn't too bad, but it wasn't too great, either, 'cause that's what was really "bothering" me...

"Well, you seem tired, so I'll just, um..." I stopped, watching her stretch her long legs to their full extent before folding them neatly under her and sitting on them in a formal position. She glanced at me.

"Kenshin?"

"...just...uh, I'll just...go...now... G-Goodnight!" I finally managed to stutter before jumping up and walking hastily toward the door.

"Wait!" Kaoru called. "Please?" I bit my lip and swallowed hard.

"Y-Yes, Kaoru? What do you need?"

"Can you wait outside for me before going to bed?" she asked nervously. No, too risky, I can't...

"Yes, I'll be right there."

"Thank you!"

I found myself waiting outside her door, nervously toying with my sleeve. Crap. What'd I get myself in to?

In a matter of minutes, Kaoru emerged from her room, dressed in a sleeping yukata, her damp hair combed. How do women do that? They take hours one minute and the next they clean up in less than thirty seconds.

My attention was quickly drawn back to her when she slid her arms around my waist and hugged me tightly. I returned it on impulse.

"Thank you so much for tonight," she whispered, her head resting in the crook of my neck. Mmmm...she smelled so good...

"You're...You're welcome..." I replied, not too attentive, her scent and propinquity attracting most of my attention.

"I really enjoyed it," she continued. "You don't know how...how long I have been waiting for you...for this..."

My mind snapped back to her words. Okay, so it was a while, but once again, not my fault!

"...And thanks a lot for dinner, it was great. Sorry I couldn't pay for myself..."

"It's fine Kaoru, I told you..."

"No, it isn't. I know what you told me, but I don't like mooching off of you." She smiled, pulling her face back to look at me. "I don't want to be like Sano..."

I grinned. She was pretty damn close... "Sorry, Kaoru, but I'm not going to take your money..."

"I know." And just like that, she pulled away. Of course, what was I expecting, a goodnight kiss? I really needed to get my mind outta the gutter (AN-do they have gutters in the 19th century...?). "Goodnight."

"Sweet dreams," I answered, turning to leave.

"And, Kenshin?"

I turned back around. "Ye–"

She grabbed me by the elbows and pressed up against me, pushing her lips against mine. One of her hands traveled up to the back of my neck and she started toying with the shorter hairs at the nape of my neck in an almost idle way. Her lips parted slightly under mine and I couldn't help but do the same, while her other hand attempted to pull me even closer...

I couldn't help it. I started kissing her just a little bit deeper and she moaned softly. My hands began exploring her body, going a little farther than I intended...

I must've gone a little too far, because just as my hand slid over her neck into the folds of her yukata, she pushed me away.

"Goodnight," she said, grinning. Her door snapped shut in my face.

I probably sat there staring at that door like an idiot for about twenty minutes before my brain re-stabilized and I stumbled outside. I sat down on the porch, burying my face in my hands. Damn...calm down...calm down...

Somebody sat next to me. I raised my head.

"You blew it?!" he exclaimed, misunderstanding my state of "depression."

"No, I didn't," I snapped, folding my arms across my chest tightly. I looked away and sighed. This was going to be a long night...

"Then what's the matter?" Sano asked. "What happened? And...why are you all wet?" He eyed me suspiciously.

I closed my eyes. "So this is it, isn't it? I took Kaoru out on a date, and everything went, more or less, just fine. I should feel like I won a big victory... Then why do I feel like shit...?" I pondered out loud.

Sano was silent for a minute. "I don't know, maybe your date went wrong and you don't know it... Tell me what happened!"

I glared at him. Thanks for the support, dumb ass. "None of your fucking business." He looked a little shocked, but suddenly he grinned.

"Ah, you didn't get a goodnight kiss, did you?"

I bit my lip, the same lip that Kaoru had been biting. Oh, I had gotten a goodnight kiss, all right...

"No, you were in there a long time, you had to have gotten _something_..." He was still smiling stupidly at me. "And you never told me what happened to you and Kaoru; you're both all wet..."

I narrowed my eyes and stood up. I could tell him...but halfway through the story I'd probably get up and attempt to go into Kaoru's room. No, the best thing to do would be go to sleep and forget all about it.

Actually... I sat back down with another sigh. I had to knock myself unconscious, so the rurouni could come back and live all happily ever after, while I returned to rotting in his semi-sane brain, nothing but a faded memory...

Well, my plan looked better on paper, that's for sure.

Maybe I'd get lucky and he'd let me come out once in a while, but, hell, who was I kidding, if I was him (which I technically am...) and I had Kaoru in my life (which I technically do...), I would never want to share with anyone, not even myself. Besides, I had temporarily forgotten he had been detecting my every thought. He was probably pissed at me for making out with Kaoru and thinking about her in a 'disrespectful' way.

Oh, well. I would suck it up and get over it. I'd been doing it for ten years, anyway. But I'd really miss Kaoru...

I swear if that rurouni screws it up with her I'll kill somebody.

"Hello? Kenshin? You okay?" Sano's voice brought me back. I glanced at him.

"Hit me as hard as you can in the face," I demanded, trying not to change my mind. I had to do it, this was all I came here for...

Sano's eyes widened and he looked at me ludicrously. "What?! You must be joking, I couldn't do that..."

"Do I _look_ like I'm joking?!" I hissed, grabbing his shirt again. "Just do it, okay!?"

"No. I couldn't, I don't want to hurt you..."

"Do it or I'll cut your damn head off."

"Are you serious? Why do you want me to..."

I unsheathed the stupid backwards sword and pointed it at him.

"Okay, okay!" He stood up and I did the same, re-sheathing the sword.

"Right here..." I said, pointing my forehead. He raised his eyebrows, but raised his fists, still a little wary.

"Okay...here ya go..." I closed my eyes as he pulled back his arm...

Suddenly my head exploded with a sharp pain. Fucking fuck, the dumb ass could throw a punch...damn, it really,_ really_ hurt! I think I fell backwards...but suddenly Sano's voice swam into my head.

"Kenshin!? Are you alright?!"

I opened my eyes. He was standing over me, a horrified expression on his face. He held out his hand to me.

I staggered to my feet without his help and took my sword from my belt, sheath and all...

"What're you-Ow!"

...And I beat the shit out of his head with it. After a few hits I put it back, my frustration almost gone. The headache was still there, though, and it was pounding relentlessly in my head.

Sano, however, was not amused. "What the hell!? You _asked_ me to hit you!!"

"I told you not to hold back and you did."

"Well, of course, I didn't want to knock you ou–ow!"

I put the sword back again, scowling. "That was the point, you idiot."

"Oh...Well then why did ya say so?"

"Forget it," I muttered, holding my head. How else could I pass out...?

"You could always drink, that always works for me," Sano said, grinning. I looked at him. Sure, why not? I still had a little money left.

"Fine..." I said, glancing back towards the dojo. "But I don't want to leave Kaoru alone..."

"Eh? Yahiko will be here, don't worry. Besides, Jou-chan can kick ass. She can take care of herself."

I guess I couldn't really argue with that. I sighed and let him pull me with him. I really should've said goodbye to her, but I probably would end up never leaving. Besides, she'd think I was insane...which is very much _not_ true! So maybe I'm little off, but it's the other me, I tell you!

Okay, enough of that...

(n.n)

My head hurt so bad. Why did it hurt so much? The light was far too painful for me to open my eyes, so I pushed myself up on my hands with my eyes still closed. Damn it, why'd it have to hurt so much? I felt like someone had beat me up and then walked all over me for fun.

My hand fell upon a small piece of paper. I sat up fully, groaning from the effort, and held the paper close to my face. Fighting against the bright light, I forced my eyes open. The paper had something written on it...

The characters were barely legible, but I suddenly recognized it. It was my handwriting! When did I write this...?

It said, "One more week." What did that mean?

That's when it hit me: I was still me! I looked down at myself, and what do you know, I was still alive! Not that I had ever been dead, but still...

I didn't remember that much of last night, only that I went out with Kaoru and then with Sano. Of course. We went drinking, and I don't remember everything...I had to have passed out...

And still, the rurouni hadn't come back yet. I looked at the paper again.

...Or had he? I don't remember writing this... Could this mean...?

Suddenly my door slid open. I looked to find Kaoru smiling back at me, already dressed in a beige gi and blue hakama. I must've looked pretty dumb, staring at a tiny piece of paper as if it held the world's key to survival.

"Good morning, Kenshin," she greeted softly. She then giggled at me. "You're so cute."

I looked at the paper, dumbfounded, then looked back at Kaoru. A smile formed on my face. I guess regretful thoughts really paid off in the end.

A whole week...think of what I could do to Kao–I mean! Think of what I could do _with_ Kaoru in a week...

That's a whole lot of kissing.

"Yes, Kaoru," I replied, feeling like the happiest person alive. "It is a good morning."

The End. Sucks. The end(ing) sucks.

Holy shit, this sucks. I had a different ending in mind, but, eh, I'll take what I can get. Thank you so much to all reviewers/readers out there. If you reviewed twice or more, than I seriously love you. Love you with all my heart. Sure, I'm a slacker with no inspiration, but you stayed with me for a couple chapters. Thanks so much! Thank you, thank you, thank you!

MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, I LOVE MY REVIEWERS! YOU ROCK! THANKS AGAIN!


End file.
